I like the sound of that.  Like, a lot.  I’ve pretty much always wanted that to be me.

“Work hard” is something I aspire to unreservedly.  At any point when my work receives praise, when I get good grades, or just feel good about my accomplishments, I look for ways to work harder, ways to give more effort, more time, more of me to the things I love – ways to be better.

I like playing hard, too. I mean who doesn’t? But I really do. I like the night out in clubs and bars. (I hate California’s no booze sold after 2 AM law. Some of my best memories are of staggering out of a bar at 5 AM and crawling through the historic parts of Prague as the sun is just coming out.) I like the circle pit at punk shows, I like jumping up and down like a crazy person at rock shows, I like movie marathons. I like it all.

Yet there is one thing I’ve never been particularly fond of: sleep.

With all the things I aspire to, all the things I wanna do and be, there has never really been time for it, and I never really minded.  I’ve always been the one defending the “sleep in the grave” philosophy. I’ve challenged the notion that I need to sleep for 8-9 hours a night (the number my mom gave me) in nearly all possible ways that don’t involve drugs or any other “helpers.” It’s been driven by sheer enthusiasm for all the other things out there: “I could go to bed now, or I could watch a movie and then read a book and then maybe…”

Unfortunately, this is not a sustainable lifestyle. Trust me, I tried. I wanted so badly to make it work, but I’ve come to realize it is simply not possible.

Moreover, I know that “work hard” involves proper rest. Good rest and sleep is necessary for the brain to function correctly and all such stuff. Yet an even stronger need for sleep arises from my being an athlete. A good night’s sleep is a basic requirement for proper training quality and performance. Thus sleeping well is a direct component of working hard.

I know all this. I’ve heard the facts and I intellectually understand them (even with my sleep-deprived brain). Yet I find this incredibly difficult to apply in practice.

Especially when the work piles up, I tend to set out for all-nighters with a strong can-do attitude and twisted pleasure from the plan itself. But really, I tend to put off sleep all the time. Take right now for example. It’s 3:15 AM. I’m getting up at 8 with a full day of meeting friends and going to the movies ahead of me (true hard work, I know, but that’s not the point now, the point is I have a full schedule). The next morning I’m flying back to California for the semester. I also need to pack and go visit the grandparents tomorrow. I’m planning on spending the evening before I fly out just hanging with my mom and enjoying each other before I disappear for 5 months. That’s a pretty full schedule, and I didn’t even mention all the “little things” I want to do, like read and write. Yet here I am, writing a blog post.

It’s now 3:22, and I think I’m gonna slowly head to bed (I’ll pack and little bit and read a short story on the way).

Working hard also means sleeping well and enough. This is a truth I need to learn to live by.